The End is Nigh: Getting the Most from your Apocalypse Experience (Introduction)

This is a series designed to help you embrace the apocalypse that our modern media has encouraged us to not only accept, but to embrace. It is broken up into 9 topics of general advice on how to get the most out of your own personal apocalypse, whatever it may be.

The End is Nigh: Getting the Most from your Apocalypse Experience (Part 2: Making Peace with “God”)

How does one make peace with the Almighty? First, you have to believe in an Almighty. If you do not believe in an Almighty, then you can skip this section and go straight to part 3. Congratulations! You move to the head of the class.

The End is Nigh: Getting the Most from your Apocalypse Experience (Part 3: Things You Will Need)

Does the title of this section befuddle you? “Hey, you just told me to burn all my crap! Now you tell me I may have needed some of that shit?” No, silly! All you will need is certain human characteristics – the shit in your head. The shit you can’t burn. Haven’t we all tried?Continue reading “The End is Nigh: Getting the Most from your Apocalypse Experience (Part 3: Things You Will Need)”

The End is Nigh: Getting the Most from your Apocalypse Experience (Part 4: Know Your Surroundings)

Look around you right now. What do you see? Take a quick mental inventory. Now close your eyes, count to ten and answer this question: How many flowers, pictured or real, are in your current environment?

The End is Nigh: Getting the Most from your Apocalypse Experience (Part 7: How do I Know if it is REALLY the Apocalypse?)

Holy shit. You’re just asking this question now? I hope you haven’t been following this book in a literal sequence, or you just might be in a world of shit right now.

The End Is Nigh: Getting the Most from your Apocalypse Experience (Part 9: Now the So-Called Apocalypse has Come and Gone. How can I Get My Money Back?)

Finally, a sensible question. You want your money back? Write me a letter, in care of this publisher, expressing your heartfelt dissatisfaction. If I am still alive, and I am really, truly touched, moved, amused or impressed with your reasoning for why you feel you should get your money back, I will send you yourContinue reading “The End Is Nigh: Getting the Most from your Apocalypse Experience (Part 9: Now the So-Called Apocalypse has Come and Gone. How can I Get My Money Back?)”

Snowden, UFOs, and WTF?!

I was just poking around YouTube looking for some interesting documentaries. I found a video clip that was about two and a half minutes long claiming that Edward Snowden, everyone’s favorite NSA whistleblower, had “revealed evidence of UFO realty” (I think the computer-generated voice was meant to say “reality”… or maybe you can buy someContinue reading “Snowden, UFOs, and WTF?!”